0
Hold your breath,
This is the part where the pressure in the airlock drops,
And if you don't time it just right...
Your heart might just stop.
It's the vacuum that wants you back,
The crushing groans of the lack,
And the night, and the nothing,
That stretches time between those urgent worlds of fire.
Take the time to mourn for those fresh breaths,
Yearn for full lungs again,
To consume without thinking,
Those moments taste like freedom,
I'm starting to forget them.
The outside is below freezing,
And the panic at the vastness,
Has my focus captive,
Just enough to get through it,
To not need it, to not want it,
To eat the sun like the bodhi trees do.
0
Another cigarette burns carelessly between two fingers,
good company, old friend,
the smoke is a reminder,
nothing lasts, nothing should.
Tonight's full moon has turned the world into an upside exclamation point,
shouting instructions in a language,
too subtle to decipher.
I know something is wrong,
it's felt in the crack of knuckles,
the shallow sound escaping a drawn out yawn,
the dull loneliness that scuttles in your periphery,
haunts all the corners,
and reminds you of lovers,
that slipped through the fingers,
like time through the minutes marked on a clock.
It's withdrawal you know.
Love is a drug,
I need you cause I love you,
I love you cause I need you,
I need to know the difference,
I refuse to stop trying.
I knew it once,
but the timing was wrong,
said the stitches to the itches,
trying in vain to hold on.
This full moon will rise,
and the tension from the tides,
will crash on your conscience,
and pull each one slowly.
So as you bleed for the last,
and pray for the next,
in breaths that yearn to follow the bubbles stolen from jaded, swollen lungs,
Just to be pulled under,
a victim of submission,
just to be found again,
and drown again.
0
She laps against my ankles, an ocean and a taste
Forever is the fear that bends my legs,
and keeps me here.
Why swim when I breathe air,
solid ground is rare enough,
I raise my knees to my chest,
match time with an increasing pulse.
These lush highs keep me dizzy,
busy holding consciousness,
lamenting my conscience,
as it shows up,
a moment too late.
The lesson in her eyes,
that close,
at my expense.
I can't sleep beside you.
